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Review for Paul Markham Teens

Rating: 79/100
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Paul Markham has over 15 years experience as a professional photographer, shooting hundreds of girly-girls in all sorts of action. This site, his own, serves as an archive of the work of one man and his cam… and for the most part, a cute chick and her vibrator.

Remember pornography on the web circa 1996, when jpgs were all the rage, and teenagers were played by 20something mail-order Czechoslovakians? Paul Markham’s Teens reminds me of this younger, simpler time. These were the days of the photo series, in which a attractive girl-not-really-next-door would explore her body in a direct manner, stopping on occasion to let an equally attractive male or female do the exploring for her.

Except it’s not 1996 anymore. Skip ahead a decade on the evolutionary smut cycle and we find the web chockfull of teens played by actual teenagers. Today’s youngin’s don’t have it so easy—routinely exploited, degraded, used, abused, cummed on, spat on, shat on… well, maybe were not quite there yet… all in the name of beautiful smut.

And I’m not saying anything is wrong this current trend, I’m just saying not everybody gets off on seeing your standard high school dropout (probably your sister) get bukkakized by a gang of ex-cons. Some people don’t dig the depravity. Some people just want good old fashioned wholesome fun—and this is the site from them (not me, though, I like my depravity just fine).

So for those of you looking for the clean, fresh-faced smut of yesteryear—you should be all over Paul Markham’s Teens.

What we have here is a combination of photosets (1000+) and videos (350+) all shot by the titular photographer. Photos can be viewed in low, medium, or high resolutions. Most videos last an average of 12 minutes. Vids are mostly solo, lesbian, or straight sex, played in your browser with windows media player in 320x240 at 1000kb/s...

Navigating around Paul Markham Teens is fairly straight forward, though it sports a slightly dated layout. Categories are broken down into solo, couples, big tits, inter-racial etc. The girls can be searched for based on their rating, how recently they’ve been added, or by name. Most girls resurface throughout the site, which is good if you take a particular shine to one, bad if you find one ugly. Unfortunately, some content can appear in different categories, making the site seem more extensive than it actually is. Another complaint is the occasional occurrence of dead links.

A further parallel PM Teens has to the web of porno’s past is the inclusion of a jokes/stories section, featuring classics such as "How do you get a nun pregnant?" Thankfully, you’re here for the teen pussy, not the hilarious zingers. But what the hell, they’re there if you want 'em, that’s something, I guess… Oh and yeah, "Ya fuck her."

No additional access to other sites is included with the membership fee, which would be a drag if the site didn't make up for it in original content. As said above, this is strictly devoted to the decade and a half of collected works by Paul Markham and his many, many teens.

So just who is this mysterious Paul Markham? Uhh, hmm, errr... I'm not sure. Judging by the voices and faces of the girls featured on the site, my guess is that he's some mustachioed, speedo-wearing European impresario but I could be wrong. I really wouldn't know. No bio or photo is supplied. A brief, nonspecific greeting on the front page is our only line into the cameraman's twat-filled universe.

Such puzzling behavior aside, the dude's photography skills are quite good. Sporting a similar porno-aesthetic to the late, great Clive Maclean of Hustler noteriety, Paul Markham's photo shoots feature bright, well-lit sets, sparse but decorous make-up jobs, cute panties, cuter quims, and most importantly, smiles all-around. This shit looks like candy floss!

And that's the problem—while some explicit material is seen, those who long for something more hardcore should set their sights elsewhere. Fans of Barely Legal ilk will be pleased with the selection of cuties on display, though most appear to be within the 21-25 age bracket, as opposed to genuine flesh-and-blood teenies. Most content is your abovementioned cookie-cutter hot chicks n’ vibrators slash faux-lesbian action, et al. Well-shot, well-made. And if your wife finds this on your internet history, she’ll probably be more turned-on than anything… as opposed to finding out about your membership to and wondering why the hell she married a fucked up pervert like yourself. For shame.

Me? I just don’t go in for this bubblegum stuff anymore… but what can I say, I review porn for a living, of course my tastes are going to be refined—more PNA (piss in ass) than TNA. Unlike me however, if you have a job, are of sound-mind or wear khaki’s or something then the site’s stiff $29.95 monthly fee is completely within reach.

CLICK HERE TO VISIT Paul Markham Teens!


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